Thirteen Things We Did Instead of Last Week's Thursday Thirteen

When the cat's away... One of the last things I said to the editorial staff as I left the office last week for a convention was, "Mind the blog." When no Thursday Thirteen appeared, I assumed they were all so busy with their first priority of editing that they just couldn't get to it. Now I find out what they were really up to...

Editors Gone Wild! 1. At 9:01 a.m. we staggered through the doorway, bleary-eyed, and began the arduous trek toward the coffee pot. 2. At 9:34 a.m. we played Paper, Rock, Scissors over who got to wield Raelene's whips for the day. 3. At 10:15 a.m. we argued over the finer points of wereduck romance. 4. At 11:45 a.m. we were still arguing when our stretch limo pulled up to take us to lunch. 5. Noon to 1:00 is sort of a blur. We dined on bull testicles and had our first three rounds of martinis. 6. At 1:12 p.m. we were still drinking martinis, save for the unnamed editor who had passed out facedown in her drink. 7. At 2:21 p.m. we arrived back at the office to find all of our red pens missing and the dictionaries taped shut. The ransom note indicated that it was the work of the nefarious warehouse staff. 8: At 2:22 p.m. we launched a full-out attack to secure the return of our pens. 9. At 2:56 p.m., suffering from multiple paper cuts, we crept back downstairs and finally fired up our computers. 10. At 3:13 p.m., exhausted from firing up our computers, we took a nap. 11. At 4:39 p.m. we began to wake from our naps, sluggishly peeling Post-It note eyemasks off of our faces. 12. At 4:55 p.m. we shut down our computers and congratulated ourselves on a day well-spent. 13. At 5:01 p.m. we trekked out to our cars...and realized too late that with all the work we had been doing, somehow we had forgotten to post a Thursday 13.